preshuz

This weekend has been a stressful one. The OLD me would’ve stayed depressed, not eaten or worked out.

I’m trying not to do that anymore. Yesterday & today, I used my stress and took it out on my workouts. I worked out hard both days. I feel like with every ball of sweat that released from my pores made my heart feel that much lighter. I didn’t feel AS stressed and I definitely didn’t make myself more stressed. Oh, and I’m eating pretty well. I might make it through a WHOLE weekend and not mess up my eating habits.

My body is so sore, but I just know that I’m giving my all towards my workouts.

Now onto Mother’s Day. I spent the day with the mom and other mothers I know. My best friend’s mom made a comment that just didn’t sit well with me. My best friend made a comment on how I’m older than her [by 4 days] and I’ll be 26 this year. So my best friend’s mom was like “When are you going to have a baby?? Don’t have a baby when you’re old. I was 28 and that was old.”

I was complaining to Nancy about this a few days ago when she had her blog about having kids.

It just bothers me that people feel the need to tell ME when I should have a child. I would love to be a mother, but it’s not MY TIME. To me, I’m still young. I still want to enjoy my life. There’s so many things I want to do before bringing a child into this world. Like finishing my masters degree, having a better job, maybe even a home of my own.

I guess it’s “expected” of me to have a kid right now because ALL three of my best friends have children. Solange has 2 sons, Paula has a daughter, Maria has a son and is pregnant. Stephanie is childless.

[End Vent Session]

So, I didn’t think that I would be able to take any vacations this year or really do anything fun in the summer with work & school! BUT my best friend just invited me on a couple’s weekend getaway to Martha’s Vineyard. I LOVE Martha’s Vineyard. It’s close by, but still far away on an island where I don’t feel like I’m here. It’s going to be so relaxing.

This means that I want to be bikini ready by June 20th (doubt I’ll go to the beach before then). Sounds like a reasonable enough time to reach my goal.

I feel more dedicated when I have a clear, concise goal to focus on.

I just want to feel GREAT when I’m in that bikini laying on the beach. Feel comfortable in my skin..

My promise to myself is that I will take pictures and not hide anything. Last year in Miami I took pictures from angles so I could “hide” certain areas. I was always the type of person to wear a bikini with shorts & a shirt on top until last year, but even then I didn’t feel good in it.

NOT THIS YEAR! I feel a new sense of confidence.

Step & Sculpt class was scheduled for 9AM today. Ask me if I went. Go ahead….NOPE

I can’t seem to get over the fear of Step class. I’ve attended the class before at my old gym and of course AFTER the class I felt great, but during it I was so lost. I can’t keep up with the choreography. The instructor just throws out words & I don’t know what they mean so I just stumble around and miss so many steps.

I just feel so embarrassed…

I’ve gotten encouraging words from people to push me to go. I mean if I really want to learn there’s only ONE way - to go to the class! That’s the only way I will learn the routines. That seems to be the hardest part for me; convincing myself to go. There’s nothing I can’t do .. I know this. So I need to get rid of this fear!

Last night I watched some Step aerobics on youtube. I loved this one!

I walked into Gold’s Gym and the vibe I got as soon as I walked in wasn’t the best. I ask the lady at the desk if I could get a tour. She said you can walk around yourself. WHAT? I have to show myself around? No one is going to help me? I’m not the type that likes to be bombarded with sales people, but c’mon I will have questions about the facility and at least act like you care about me becoming a customer. So I walked around with my boyfriend and I didn’t like what I saw. Yeah it was cheap, but it wasn’t a good fit for me. I knew I wouldn’t enjoy going there & all in all, I want to ENJOY my workouts.

So I had a backup plan, Bally Total Fitness. I went in there and the vibe was way better. Kevin walked me around, told me about the place and tried to sell it to me. I felt pressured into signing in because there was a “One Day Sale”. Don’t get me wrong. I liked the place and it was a nice deal, but I wasn’t 100% sold on it. Not the missing piece to my puzzle.

I came home & thought about it. Finally the decision was made - BOSTON SPORTS CLUB! I know a lot of you were not for BSC because of the price, but I think it’s worth it. I love the facility, the people are very helpful, lots of classes, it’s convenient to my house & when I hop off the train from work it’s RIGHT THERE! Another thing that it came down to was motivation. My boyfriend motivates me and gives me that extra push that I need.

So I got a workout after I signed up on the bike & on my lower body. My boyfriend KICKED my butt (my own personal trainer). My legs are already sore on top of the soreness from Kickboxing yesterday. I love it though. I can’t wait to workout tomorrow!

You’re probably reading the title of this blog like huh?? Happy?? Yup, but I am. Want to know why?

Because I’m only going to fight HARDER now to lose it. It was a slap in the face this morning when I got on the scale, but there is NO point of getting discouraged and wanting to give up. Nope. I’m going to take control of the situation and not let the scale or the 4lbs take control of me.

I know where I “messed up”. It was all the food I ate last weekend with no workouts. Weekends are still a challenge for me. That’s when the good habits tend to go out the window & I can’t seem to understand why I let myself do that.

I need to fight it! I’m going to WIN! These 4lbs will be gone soon I’ll get back to my mini goal, but not without lots of hard work & determination.

Lots of bad food in the office this morning (party for a co-worker who’s leaving). I’ve been staying away from the hash browns & BK breakfast sandwiches. I did have a cinamon raisin bagel & 2 munchkins. I’m trying to fill myself up with fruits & water until lunch time.

Signing up for my new gym TODAY! I’ll let you all know which one I decided on later Stay tuned.

So tomorrow is the last day of my gym membership. I am soooo sad to leave! I absolutely love my gym because it’s convenient to work, all women, spa-like, many classes are available, clean, towel service, personal tvs on the machines, HUGE, etc.

I canceled my membership because it was pretty expensive and my job will be moving to another office in the summer so it wouldn’t be convenient anymore for me.

So now I’m left with the decision of what to do…where to go.

I was going to just work out at my college’s gym, but that will be out of my way on the weekends and I will be only be on campus 2x or 3x at the most. No classes either (would have to pay extra for that).

I’m trying to join another gym, but I don’t know which one to choose. What would you do?

Choice #1: Boston Sports Club

Pros:

- convenient to my house

- HUGE (3 floors)

- clean

- my boyfriend goes there so we could work out together

- classes available

- frills:  towel service, personal TVs on machines, pool, juice bar, basketball court

Cons:

- $39 initiation fee / $59 a month

- have to sign a one year membership

- might be moving August 1st so it won’t be convenient anymore

- co-ed & I’m more hesitant to workout in the weights area because of that; I need to get over that!

Choice #2: Gold’s Gym

Pros:

- on May 1st is having a One Day Sale of $69 for the whole summer

- no contract

- classes availble (but limited times)

- still close to home, but not as close as BSC (next town over)

- has an all women’s section

Cons:

- still no workout buddy

- I might’ve been spoiled at my current gym so it won’t be as nice to me, but then it’s like I don’t need all the frills!

I had one of the most wonderful experiences of my life today. I volunteered for the Boston Marathon.

This is a day I will never forget. The expressions on people’s faces of pain, but more important complete & utter JOY. That’s a feeling I want to have one day. That is such a great accomplishment. A 26 mile run. Talk about determination, but that’s what I have. What is stopping me? Nothing. Who is stopping me? No one.

I’m going to start small. Continue with my 5K races progress to 10Ks, then eventually half marathons and then the Boston Marathon (one of the toughest in the world). 50 states and 60 countries competed today. It was really an epic event.

I’m not saying I’m going to do this next year, but I will ONE DAY. I am going to keep on training and working my way towards this goal. There is nothing I can’t do! I realized this yesterday when I crossed the finish line for my 5K. With dedication and focus, the possibilities are ENDLESS. This is coming from someone who isn’t an athlete by any means, but I have HEART. I have the passion and with that nothing can get in my way!

The same holds true for all you buddyslimmers! What is stopping you from your goal? Whatever your goal is it’s something important to you. Don’t EVER give up. Keep on pushing forward until you accomplish it!

I DID IT! I’m so proud of myself. I did something I never thought I would ever do because I used to hate running. I woke up bright & early at 5:30am anticipating the run, went back to sleep for another hour, ate oatmeal, drank water & made my way to the run.

Let’s just say the run wasn’t easy, but it wasn’t hard. I’ll admit there were times I wanted to stop, but I DIDN’T! I ran the whole time! No matter what I kept on going. It was soooo cold this morning (40°), but once I started running I was burning up. Whenever I wanted to stop, I looked down at my shoelaces on my left sneaker where I put my timing device (my boyfriend is a lefty) so I could think about my boyfriend and how he would’ve been pushing me the whole way. He was waiting for me at the finish line so that was more motivation for me. Also, Nancy I thought of you! You were there with me in spirit and I kept telling myself GO, GO, GO!

I finished at 30 mins and 32 secs which is better than the 32 minutes I did on the treadmill and that was at a constant speed. I had my tunes on my iPod and that helped me to keep going! It was a little discouraging when people were going by me, but that’s okay. I was doing this for ME and no one else!

I didn’t even know that this was the FIRST year for the 5K race, but guess what…I will make it my own tradition and do it every year! My bf said he was jealous when he saw people running so he’s going to do it next year too lol.

I am soooooo tired right now. I just ate a real breakfast & I’m ready to pass out!

Before the race!

I’m so cold lol.

The huge crowd of people.

VICTORY IS MINE! I’m done! Rockin’ my medal! w/ my bag of goodies from the race. I’m sooooo tired!

I went to the gym today and spent nearly 3 hours there. I did a 30 minutes weights class, 45 minute on the bike, 1 hour ZUMBA class! Yes, ZUMBAAAA! I finally tried it & I loved it. I love dancing so I had a lot of fun. So I’ve accomplished my challenge of taking a new class this month.

After the gym, I walked over to the Hynes Convention Center & picked up my 5K materials (free shirt, bib & timing device). I can’t believe my race is tomorrow. I’m nervous & excited! I’m hoping this will be the beginning to longer races — 10K next! Maybe one day I’ll be in the Boston Marathon. I saw so many people in the city today with their Boston Marathon gear on. I will be volunteering for the Boston Marathon on Monday and I heard it’s a great experience — get to see it in another perspective.

I will let you all know how the 5K is tomorrow! Wish me luck

HOORAYYYYYY!!! *THROWS CONFETTI*

I’m at my mini goal of 135! 12 pounds down! I know I still need to lose a few more pounds & tone up, but I’m not too sure if I want to be at 125 when I’m done. Last time I was 125 I was in high school and I was skinny (still had curves), but we’ll see as I keep losing weight. I just want to be healthy and feel GREAT about myself! That’s my ultimate goal.

Yesterday was my group presentation for class. I was SO NERVOUS!! I’m a shy person and I don’t like speaking in front of the class. It’s done now and I feel soooo much better! My group members said that I did awesome, but of course I don’t feel that way. The professor’s opinion is what matters most since he will be grading me. Hopefully I did well!

After class, my classmates & I went to the bar to celebrate the end of spring semester. I had a couple beers. I swear they kept filling up my glass and I’m like “guys…beer is like juice to me it will do nada!” lol, I’m not a lightweight by no means. I had a couple shots too, but I left the bar as sober as could be.